She flinches back and I briefly feel bad for being so nasty to her, when she only wants to help, but I shake it off. I walk to the chair that has my dirty, bloodstained clothes. I drop the hospital gown, not caring who sees my scars anymore. If they want to care forthey can look atas I am, and learn to do it without looking atlike I arn broken or with pity. I despise pity. I dress slowly, keeping every sound of pain stuffed deep in my chest. I know it's punishingto not ask for help, but this is howit has always been forand they should see that too.
going to the Beta house, to my isolated room where no one bothersor cares about what I am doing. I'm going back to having freedom and contro without having to checkin every three seconds with someone or having people followand forceto do things differently without a second Search the Findwebsite on Gøøgle to access chapters of early and in the highest quality.
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtthought or even just asking if I'm alright with the change, assuming they know what's best for me. You think you can makehealthy? I wouldn't even know what that is. I seeth, on a roll now, directing all my unfiltered anger out into the hallway to the guys, Sierra, the Alpha, Gamma and Deltas. "Il am broken beyond repair and I have been surviving that way for as long as I can remember. You heard the doc, irreparable damage has been done. There is nothing you can fix, cause even on my worst day I still perform better than everyone in that hallway pretending to care about me, while overlooking everything that has ever been wrong with me. I will heal myself, by myself, it just works better that way. I'm sorry Luna, I just can't do this anymore, it hurts too much.
My voice is raspy and my throat hurts but I continue to speak. "Maybe somewhere everyone has a soft spot for the small, spare beta The one her father can't even stand to look at Or be around, who TOLD the principal to punish her more because she is unworthy and could use the lesson in humility. I do not want pity love. I don't want love that comes from feeling bad for my situation. This is me, damaged and messed up, lovelike this or not at all. I can't change for everyone else anymore. I turn my back on her and walk toward the treatment room door and find all of my so-called friends and family huddled red -eyed and grief stricken. Their eyes widened at the gruessight of me. Even my dad had the decency to show up and feign a look of shame. I just rolled my eyes and walked past everyone down the hallway and out the door.
I ran all the way back to my house, pain shooting up my legs, not noticing or caring if people were staring at me. I let myself in the back door like always and walked the silent halls to the staircase leading to my former prison. I ascend slowly, everything about this feels wrong, but so does the thought of going to my room at the packhouse_ I don't belong here, it doesn't fit anymore. Like clothes that are just too small, no longer comfortable and easy, but suffocating and tight. I agree with my wolf, the packhouse is hnow, but I just can't be around the guys or even Sierra right now.
I make it into my room and head straight for the shower to get rid of the evidence of my self destruction. I don't cry though, which is something new forme- I'm not sure if I am just all cried out or if the anger has finally taken over the sadness.
I climb out, dry off and get dressed. The first thing I need to do is figure out how long I have been at the hospital and see if I have missed any school.
All my stuff is in my room at the packhouse. Just another thing I'm going to have to deal with later. I leave my door locked and head out the window, just like old times. I can't believe it's been almost a year since I have had to sneak out. I don't need anyone scentingcand go. I head straight for school taking the well worn long way through the woods.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmSneaking in a back entrance that I broke a couple years ago so I had a quick escape in or out if I needed it. And I needed it on a regular basis.
Now, who to talk to to get caught up on the day? Doc T. is a no go. The pack doctor is just going to sendback to the hospital and almost
guaranteed to call Luna Ava. The only other person who doesn't completely hateis MK Lyons the history En! teacher. He is old and could care less
about pack . The hallways are empty and I think it's tog early for lunches take all the paths that I En know are blindspots for the security
cameras. That will be one of the first I things I fix when I get back fromm training but for now I'm going to use them to my advantage. I peak around corners like a criminal just trying to make it to his classroom and not get caught sneaking into school.